Rules of the House
While Kath is gone, all residents (including humans, bears, garden snakes, and occasional bugs) must obey these rules.
1) The making of beds is encouraged, but feel free to leave a cup out on the nightstand, or maybe a Wired magazine.
Extra frilly pillows are optional:
2) Cups may also be left in other disheveled locations around the house:
3) Oatmeal is recommended for breakfast, but toppings may be completely stirred in:
4) Pictures of meals do not require candlelight. Also, paper towels may be used for napkins:
5) It is recommended that you wash dishes soon after dirtying, however, they do not need to be dried and put away immediately.
6) There are no foods that are off-limits. This is especially true for expensive items:
7) Rambunctious bear-play has been extended to two hours of mayhem:
That about covers it!
Tonight I have a Great Harvest employee party to attend. Fondue, a keg of Magic Hat, and good times! More updates as events warrant…





{ 93 comments… read them below or add one }
Love all your posts, Matt!
This post is ADORABLE!
lol!! you and kath are the cutest couples ever!
i can’t wait for all this week’s posts!
OMG! Hilarious! I enjoy all of Kath’s posts and yours too, but I can just imagine what she has to say about your posts – too cute! I can’t wait to see what the rest of the week holds.
ahahaha. Love the bears!
I am Cracking up!!!!
Love, love, love your post Matt! Glad you seem to be enjoying yourself. Tonights party sounds fun!
Too funny!
I think that beastly bear in the back of the box has a brother! (say that 10 times fast!) I have one that looks just like him.
That is too funny!!!! Keep up the great posts!!
**on the floor, laughing hard**
You are too funny! Better get those unruly bears (and cups) under control before Kath comes home….
I honestly snorted at the bears pushing each other down the stairs!!! Awesome post!
Those bears down the stairs are too funny! I have to say though I’d be MAD if I came home from a trip and my expensive grocery items were eaten. Luckily BF doesn’t like my “fancy” food like Greek yogurt or almond butter. I don’t think I’ll ever have to worry about him eating my share
I worried for a minute about my grandbears, until I decided that stair sledding is safe if you are made of fluff. Glad they are having fun!
Hahaha oh how I enjoy Matt’s posts! You two are such a cute married couple! Your house is adorable too!
hahahahahahahahah, love the mini-rebellion. have fun tonight. mmmm, fondue!
Loved, loved, loved the post! I was laughing so hard after seeing the bears sledding down the stairs! Thanks for a giggle during the end-of-the-weekend blues!
Sounds like you are keeping yourself occupied LOL!
HAHA! I loved this post!! The bear pictures cracked me up!
Hilarious!
I can hardly imagine Kath’s reaction to this post. I’m sure it will put a huge smile on her face!
YOU need to DISCIPLINE those BEARS because someone is going to get HURT and its on your watch! Just tell them no honey for dessert! Teddy Bear Protective Services (TBPS) needs to be called!
Hilarious! and a Magic Hat keg sounds awesome – esp on a Sunday!
Haha, I think you’re having too much fun!
haha! I love this post! you’ll have to make guest appearances even when Kath returns! too funny!
diana
I don’t understand why people are appalled at the bears’ behavior. I used to do that myself in a laundry basket!
are you trying to give kath a heart attack? omg!
love the post!
HAHAHAHAHA! Oh gosh, you just made my weekend. Especially when all I am doing today is studying for finals! ACK!
Matt, you are hilarious! Best. Post. Ever.
Brew and Bake Magazine!
PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE!
with side dish of bear shenningans and trademark matt wit
matt, you rock. please keep up the guest posts even after kath gets back!
ahahahha
oh goodness.
thanks for that!
HAHAHAHA!! Those teddy bears made me choke on my drink!
I love the Matt and Home posts. Very fun.
I admit that I’m usually a “lurker” reader (ie no comments..), but this post completely made my morning so I had to let you know!
Such a great laugh first thing in the morning! The bears are hilarious!
Keep up the mischief
Funniest Post EVER hands down. Nice work Matt!
I absolutely love the ‘rules of the house’. Have fun at the employee party!
LOL…This is hilarious!! I love how you can only get the true comedic effect of this if you are a regular reader… Great post!
Hahah what a hilarious post!!!
haha love the post
you and kath are the bestest couple ever!
This is hilarious!! I especially enjoyed the consumption of expensive, typically “off-limits” items and the rambunctious bear play! Thanks for brightening my day!
Hahah soo cute
lol Your posts are awesome, Matt! I’m loving the bears.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This post had me rolling on the floor laughing!!!!!
And then I got to the bears! How did you get Bocker to stand up so well!?
STILL LAUGHING!!!!
With due respect to Kath, this blog would be hilarious if it was Matt Eats. I love that you can playfully make fun of your wife’s slightly-compulsive tendencies (I suspect most of us regular readers have them).
Best KERF post ever.
LOL loved it!
Why don’t guys like our extra decorative pillows?!!!!
Loved the post! You’re too funny, Matt. Kath is going to see this and totally get home sick.
hahaha this is such a fantastic post! I love it.
Oh, Matt. You are too hysterical. I like the shot-by-shot of the bears
that was wonderful. thanks for the laugh!
i think the bears needs their own guest post, btw…
That is hilarious! Kath, you picked the right guy to marry for sure
haha this is adorable! love it! i heart the bears
i’m also known for leaving cups all over the house, haha. i love my water!
Also a usual lurker, non-commenter, but just had to say LOL!
Aww! I love the bears! Too funny.
You live like me Matt. I guess I’m kind of a dude.
hahahha Matt, you are too funny!
Just make sure the bears don’t mess up the kitchen!
Oh my! That was hilarious!
hahaha that was soo funny
LMAO — The Teddy Bear Sleigh Ride (I just typed “rice”) is the best!
Matt!!! That is soooo funny! Too much craziness going on – Kath is never going to go away again!!!
Very cute post, Matt! kath will be very proud!
I need to train my husband to keep our house this clean when I’m gone. Last time I left for a week I came back to find the mug of tea–with the tea bag still in it–that I had drunk to wake myself up before my flight. It was in the exact same in the sink where I had left it, and hubby had just worked around it for a WEEK.
When I pointed it out, he said “I didn’t know if I should hand-wash it or put it in the dishwasher.”
Kath, I know you’re not taking any questions on your trip, but when you get back my question will be “HOW?!!”
All I have to say is …….. LOL x 100000000000
I actually laughed out loud when I read this. And then I read it all out loud to my boyfriend.
The bear pictures are hilarious!
Matt, This was quite funny!
Heather
I’m gonna make a suggestion that while Matt is filling in the blog should be called “Matt Eats Kath’s Food” or “MEKF” so long as he’s consuming Chobani and BB with wild abandon!
This post is awesome – you are toooooo funny. While the cat is away the mice will play. You are keeping the house much cleaner than my hubby would.
yay for bears. Fondue!!! Makes me think of the restaurant the Melting Pot here in MA.
Hilarious! Thanks for the good laugh. Keep up the posts. It’s fun to get to know Kath’s other half a little bit better.
HAHAHAHA…you. are. my. hero.
+1 on the no foods that are off limits. P;
HAHAHA!!! I <3 you guys!
Matt, I think you need to include these kind of posts over at B&B. It’s fun getting a peak into your world.
Matt, you are the little devil when Kath is away. You post was very entertaining. Have a great evening out with co-
workers. enjoy Magic Hat. I had one while watching Ohio State today. They lost
hahaha
AAAAHAHAHAAHAHAH!!!!! Loving the post and the bears…can’t wait to read what you have in store tomorrow……ha!
I got the HUGEST kick out of this post, picturing you and the bears giggling over the paper towels and blended oatmeal. ; ) Have fun!
OMG I am laughing so hard at the bears. Sounds like you are doing just fine at home. Love fondue, can’t wait to hear about that. Yum!
OMG.. there are tears rolling down my face!!.. not just “watery laughing eyes”.. actual wet tears!!.. This could be the funniest thing I’ve read ALL YEAR!!
totally hilarious!
I hope tomorrow you don’t let the bears stir the outmeal with their paws, without washing them first.
And I hope they don’t decide to write on the mirrors with their mom’s beloved Barney Butter.
AWESOME POST! YOU NEED TO KEEP UPDATING US ON ALL THE “BAD” THINGS YOU ARE DOING WHILE KATH IS AWAY!
My 10-year-old, also named Matt, is on the floor hysterical from the bears. I think he’s saying “I wish we had stairs,” but at this moment, I am very thankful that we don’t
AHAHAHAHHA This is the BEST post EVER!!!! I died!!!
Especially the part with the teddy bears and the expensive stuff!! LOL
This is so funny
ADORABLE post- I love the BB and tumbling bears!
oh dear god, you are hilarrrrrious. i can’t stop laughing!
I LOVE this post!! Stirring in oat toppings – now that’s living on the wild side while Kath is away
I can’t wait to read more this week!
LOL!!! OH man my husband is the same way!!!
Love the ‘Male Made bed’ too. HAHA
Matt, you are too funny!!!!
I hope my Matt isn’t up to this mischief while I am away! Hehe–CUTE post!
That truly made me laugh out loud at work. Love that Matt still has the childlike humor in him!
I really love reading this blog!! U guys are awesome I don’t have enough time to always comment on my fave blogs but wanted to let you know about my lurkyness…oh yeah I really hope the bears are okay? :p
Love the littlest bear pushing the other two down the stairs. It’s always the youngest sibling that’s the trouble-maker.
Baaahahahahhahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!! The bears on the stairs is hilarious!!!!!