This post is sponsored by Rescue
Stress is a fact of life, and we all go through periods of more or less stress. So often people use the term “de-stress,” but we can’t remove the stress from our lives – but we can control how we react to it.
I have had bigger stresses come and go over the past few years – cancer on both sides of the family, the loss of grandparents, parting ways with my husband. While at the time those major life events caused a lot of worry, most of the stress and anxiety I experience on a daily basis revolves around trying to wear two different hats at the same time: a businesswoman and a mother.
Balancing life as a “singlepreneur” (aka one-woman business) and a mom can be quite the challenge, as neither role ever completely turns off. So often I credit myself with being an excellent multitasker, but I have started to wonder if that means I’m not giving 100% to things that deserve my focused attention.
For example, I might receive an email from a client that a link in a post isn’t working right as I’m trying to get Mazen’s breakfast on the table to get him to school on time. Or maybe I’m in the middle of making a recipe post that has taken a lot longer than anticipated when it’s time to go pick him up at school. Or someone leaves me a comment that my site is down while I’m pushing Mazen on the swings at the park. Ahhh! My role as a mom takes priority, but that doesn’t mean my shoulders aren’t tense if my posts aren’t writing themselves or I have something time sensitive that will have to wait until bedtime.
I recently listened to this Lively Show podcast interview with Cass McCrory about how she juggles balance between being a mom, wife, and business owner. She set a goal to have more time to “go with the flow” in her life and live the spontaneous, carefree lifestyle we all dream about. So she took a hard look at all of the hours in her week and reevaluated her priorities. First she subtracted out time for sleep, as that is a non-negotiable, and then subtracted time for her family and other essentials, like taking the kids to their scheduled activities. She budgeted 27 hours (don’t quote me on this – I listened to this podcast in the shower! #multitasking) for her business and the rest of the time was for “flowing.” This meant that she had to compress her work week into far fewer hours than she had been previously doing, but if she worked efficiently then she would have time for the things in life that mattered most to her. This also meant that when work was done for the day, she could put away her phone, laptop, and worries and turn the work part of her brain off. Isn’t that we all need most? Designated time to not be allowed to think about work?
Listening to Cass’s schedule makeover appealed to me so much. I want to work smarter and more efficiently during set work hours too, and then I want to single-task on whatever or whoever I am with the rest of my waking hours. Obviously mini fires that need to be put out might come up – say Mazen is home sick on work time or a work thing comes up during an afternoon outing – but ideally, I’d wear only one hat at a time.
Similarly, I was listening to another podcast – this time a Young House Love episode with Grace Bonney – and she commented that having the idealized work-life balance might be something that no one really ever achieves. In real life, some days you might work really hard and your family misses out on some of your attention, and other days you might spend all day with your family and work falls to the wayside. The important thing to remember is to focus on the present and what needs your attention most on any given day and let go of the rest (as much as you can, at least!) Work-life balance means that work and life are going through their own version of the Squiggly Line Effect, ups and downs that even out to a happy balance.
In order to work more efficiently, I’ve started to tweak my own schedule. I used to be a faithful mid-morning exerciser, followed by a shower and then a work-heavy afternoon, especially when Mazen was younger and napped. But one thing I’ve realized, most notably when Mazen started 5-day-a-week school, is that I am most focused in the mornings. If I want to really work efficiently, I need to knock out my work hours before noon and just after lunch and then use the afternoon to workout or play with Mazen. When I work in the afternoons I tend to either be sleepy sitting at my desk or procrastinate on the internet too much. I don’t focus as well. So my schedule has gone through a bit of a flip lately. I’ve been working in the mornings while Mazen is in school (most days of the week, at least), exercising in the late afternoons, and showering late in the day. I don’t know how long this schedule will continue this way, but it has definitely made me more efficient and more focused – both as a businesswoman and as a mom.
When I do need to be on task in the midst of a stressful day, I’ve been enjoying the products that Rescue sent to me for this post. I recently had something upsetting happen (everything is ok, but it was not the best day!) and my friend commented on how calm I was. I actually had a Rescue Pastille in my mouth at the time! Coincidence?! The Rescue Remedy formula was developed more than 75 years ago and contains an all-natural blend of Bach flower remedies. The flowers are steeped in spring water much like tea. I keep the Rescue Remedy Spray in my purse so I have it on-the-go, including while I drive – eek! There is also an alcohol-free version that is safe for kids. If this is all a little “woo woo” for you, then at the very least, the deep breathing and placebo effect will calm you. Read all about Rescue and their products on their FAQ page here and look for where to buy them here.
Thanks to Rescue for sponsoring this post!
I laughed hard at the “woo woo” statement. I wasn’t expecting that. I heart “woo woo” stuff, though. I’ve seen bach flower remedies work wonders with horses and other animals. I imagine it would be great for people, too. I just never thought to try it on myself! Thanks for the info. 🙂
As someone who loves science and is an RD – I’m a little surprised that you’ve taken on a sponsor of a supplement that lacks science-based evidence . I’m sure individuals (including some reading this) may have found this product helpful and it is not my place to discount their experience but since this blog is your profession- this feels like an endorsement of a product to people who may consider your recommendation in your professional capacity. I do recognize that you acknowledge it could be a placebo effect or “woo woo” but I believe products like this cloud what is known to help people – nutrition, exercise and adequate healthcare (including mental). Pardon the soapbox – but supplements drive me nuts as Americans pour money into them when their money could often times be better spent.
I completely agree with this comment. I’m surprised you would partner with a brand like this, although I appreciate that some individuals may enjoy the product. It doesn’t fit with your brand, and I’m a bit disappointed.
What about it doesn’t fit with my brand?
YES! THIS! The supplement industry drives me nuts with the way they mislead customers into accepting pseudo-science. And the lack of regulatory oversight is a big problem.
Did you know that 1 in 3 supplements actually contain NONE of the active ingredient listed on the label?
I have to say that I agree with Mollie. I’m surprised you’d endorse a supplement that hasn’t shown any science-based effects. Besides, Rescue Remedy is mostly alcohol, so that may explain some of the relaxation 😉
With my 8-5:30 job + commute + 2 kids, I really applaud your ability to stay so calm and efficient, Kath! I might have to start referring to myself as a singlepreneur since I’m a single mom, too, and my job never really turns off (why does my boss need an email at 11pm?!) Ha!
I think if you’re an RD then you should applaud people for turning to other things that tend to be more natural than popping prescription meds, which is a far bigger issue than supplements. Rescue remedy is a safe, natural thing to try if someone wants a little extra help reducing stress and anxiety. If you haven’t tried it, then don’t poo poo it. As Amy Poehler says, “good for her, not for me.”
I love rescue remedy and I’ve been using it for years, although I’m sure its effects are probably all in my head. Work stress is really tough. I have a demanding job and it is difficult to juggle my career and family responsibilities. Last year, I was on call 24/7 for the entire Thanksgiving week. It was a nightmare! I admire your ability to be so successful at managing your many responsibilities while also kicking a** as a busy single mom and mother.
From now on I’m going to refer to myself as a “singlepreneur” as I too am I one-woman business. Also, I have that same red bag from Stitch Fix 😉
Man, I wish sleep was a non-negotiable! I got 3 hours of sleep Monday night because my 5 year old was having growing pains and was in distress. My husband couldn’t do the wake-ups because he had to be at a deposition in the morning and needed to be 100%. I had a meeting with our Executive Director but I function well if I miss one night of sleep so I just powered through with Diet Coke and Halloween candy. Though that drive to work and back was harrowing- driving drowsy is not cool!
Is Mazen in full day school? I appreciated the time I have with afterschool because sometimes the kids can be there and I can get an hour to clean or prep dinner post-work but before they get home.
I think your use of time management is great however its a little harder for those of us who aren’t self-employed. Do you have any great tips for those of us with supervisors who don’t understand the stress of being a working parent?
I feel for you. When I worked in an office, I didn’t have kids and was still stressed trying to fit things in, so I tip my hat to any of you working full time with kids to take care of too. The only thing I can suggest is to be as organized as possible and to say no to any after-work and weekend activities that you aren’t 100% joyful about (social activities, clubs, etc).
That is good advice! Now if only my kids would get in to activities on the weekdays. Spending Sunday morning coaching youth soccer for 4 hours (two teams, concurrent games) is eating in to my time to get stuff done. Thank goodness I can get groceries delivered! If only I could outsource exercise. Getting up at 4:30 to go for a run is getting to be a bit much.
Maybe you could do a kitchen organization post soon. I need tips on small space organizing when we have a ton of food and cans.
Erin @ Her Heartland Soul says
I love and swear by Rescue products! They really help me!
Gosh, Cass McCrory’s approach really interesting, but I guess I’m struggling to see how it fits in for those of us who work regular hours. I don’t think my boss would like it if I left after 27 hours. I think Grace Bonney’s approach is more realistic, except that I can’t let work fall to the wayside and keep my job, you know. I guess we all just have to do the best we can and hope the folks at work and family understand.
How much alcohol is in the Rescue Remedy? Maybe that’s why it’s so calming, LOL!
Well you have less “free time” than someone with flexible hours, but you could still take parts of these approaches and apply them to the time you do have at home. And yeah, you can’t just let work fall away if you’re being paid for those hours! I get it : ) And the RR has about 27% alcohol, but you’re literally puffing in a tiny squirt – it’s negligible. I wouldn’t recommend anyone drink a whole bottle to try to catch a buzz – lol!
I think it’s great that you talk about multitasking, as for so many of us single tasking isn’t an option! Unfortunately, I haven’t figured out a way to make my boss let me work less than the standard work week, even if I’m efficient enough to finish all of my tests in time – LOL. Most weeks, that’s definitely not the case, and I’m working 50 or so hours — your ability to control your own schedule and level of work commitments makes me so jealous!
I’m so intrigued by this observation — This also meant that when work was done for the day, she could put away her phone, laptop, and worries and turn the work part of her brain off. Isn’t that we all need most? Designated time to not be allowed to think about work? — especially as it relates to you and your chosen work? As I said, I work about 50-60 hours a week, often outside of my “tour of duty,” but I don’t think of my work as just a job, but more of a calling. I love the work I do, and so while it’s at times tedious, I don’t mind it because of the bigger impact. As someone who has carved out your own niche, wouldn’t you say the same?
Well that is the beauty of a lot of the full time jobs out there – when you leave work you are off. (I realize that lots of people do check work email at home or work on the weekends, and I think this is an overworked American cultural problem on a larger scale). I think no matter how much you love your job, you need time for your brain to think about other things. Just like I think moms need some off time to be themselves too every now and then. Doing anything 100% of the time (or even 80% for that matter) can be draining, and some tolerate it better than others.
Jessica Locke says
I like the Rescue products too! I have used them on and off for a few years. And I listen to the Lively Show too – Love Jess so much! I didn’t hear the Grace Bonney podcast you referred to but I did just watch her on an episode of Marie TV – are you familiar with Marie Forleo? Probably you are …
Anyway – I was on the same wavelength with you. Also, we posted a blog this week highlighting our favorite bloggers and we mentioned YOU! If you want to take a peek – you can find it at http://kitlife.net/blog/
I have heard of Marie Forleo! And thank you so much <3
How interesting! I’ve never thought of this kind of stress reliever. I’m in grad school, and even though I usually feel like I’m a pretty calm and balanced person, lately I’ve been majorly slacking on self-care in order to keep up with my workload. In moments of intense anxiety, I’ve found that suggestions like “breathe deeply,” etc. just don’t distract me enough from the distress I’m feeling, and that I need to be DOING something to get my mind off it. While I don’t think something like a pastille would be a comprehensive solution, it might help to have something to engage me orally, if only for the placebo effect that it would be an additional distraction.
That’s how I feel too.
I’m confused about these products. What are they? I’ve never heard of them before. What are Bach flowers?
Herbal supplements that help with different emotional stresses
I was surprised to see some of the comments. I personally think it’s great to see a RD discuss products like this. While I agree that supplements need to be more regulated in terms of how their promoted, I would never discount a supplement that improves a part of my life just because it’s a supplement. Thanks for talking about all sides of well-being on your blog.
Rescue products have been recommended to me for years by naturopaths, midwives, etc. and I’ve bought and tried their products. I wish that they worked for me, but somehow they don’t make an iota of difference. I do appreciate alternative and natural products like these. Just wish they worked on my body.
I don’t understand what prompts someone to get on here and express “disappointment” in this review or anything else Kath posts. She’s always honest about anything she reviews and if you disagree you can simply NOT buy it! As a community of mostly moms, some who work in the home and others who work outside it, we should be supporting each other. If you want to express your concern about the nutritional supplement market you can do that without casting disappointment over Kath. She’s an RD, I’m sure she also has some thoughts and opinions on the topic. I’m disappointed in women/moms in general who would rather use their time and words to tear each other down than build each other up.
Becky, I think the issue is that if Kath is using this product as a sponsor of her blog, that to me says “endorsement”. As an RD, I would think she would want to protect her professional reputation and only accept payment from sponsors whose products she can stand behind 100% as having actual, research-based proof to confirm their health benefits.
I can’t think of a single time a blogger has accepted sponsorship AKA payment from a brand and gone on to say that the product wasn’t all it was hyped to be – from Kath or any other blogger. Everything is always sunshine and rainbows. Hence my assumption is the blogger endorses the product.
Just my two cents – hope that helps you understand where people are coming from when they express disappointment.
hey becky – I feel like this is partly directed at me so I’ll respond. I’m not sure I can agree with the criticism of women/moms tearing other women/moms down in this case. My statement was in no way directed at Kath as a woman or a mother. It was as an RD and an individual who values science. I think it’s a disservice to us as women to think we aren’t able to respectfully vocalize difference in opinions without it being viewed as a personal attack.
I remember when you were young, waiting until you and Laura were in bed to work on my children’s church books with my co-writer. We’d work on the phone together late into the night. Now, I have LOTS more time and get so much less done. I think the energy of motherhood is magical somehow. I admire mothers so much!
Rescue Remedy is the best!! I often take it before bed, just the regular stuff, and it helps to calm my mama-brain down. If you’re not into it, let us “woo-woo’s” enjoy the relaxation and don’t criticize Kath! Y’all are missing out!!!
Excellent things to think about regarding “singletasking”. As women/moms we must multitask ALL THE TIME to survive. I’ve actually tried to step away from that occasionally and practice being more present and mindful in whatever I am doing. My default is getting through whatever I am doing to move on to the next thing on my list. Now I’m trying to focus on what I’m doing at that moment. Hoping this will make my life a little more peaceful and me a little more present for my people.
I really do not understand the bashing of the supplements. I have been a well educated supplement user for over two decades. I give them to my children. My husband, who has more health problems that you want me to list here, takes them faithfully and we’ve had nothing but positive results. With that said, I have done significant research on what we use and I only buy from a very reputable company. I’m sure there are plenty of supplements out there that would not pass standardized quality control, but I’ve also taken science based pharmaceuticals that did me more harm than good. Criticizing Kath for this post may be an expression of your opinion. That doesn’t make it truth.
I am always surprised when a blogger is bashed for writing a review about a product. This is how they generate income. It’s part of their job. You aren’t being forced to buy anything. Take it as information you may or may not use and move on.
Jenny - Support Your Beauty says
I really enjoyed reading your blog. I think I know what it feels like to become a mom. And I understand a lot now my mom – she really is the best. I will recommend this product to mom. I bet, she’ll like this. Thank you for this wonderful post :).